Thursday, January 17, 2008

Say it ain't so, Joe!!!

Yes, I have cancer. I'm a mom to three wacky kids, in love with my soul mate with red hair and glasses, and have Maggie the wonderdog. Who'd a thought.....certainly not me. Right now I'm on a roller coaster of known and unknown and can't seem to get off. What's even worse - I hate rollercoasters.

Recently during the barrage of tests the doctors have been putting me through, I was sitting in a Starbucks coffee shop. I was back in the corner sipping on hot chocolate - you know, chocolate is medicine for the soul - trying to figure out what to do next, answer work emails, wondering if I'd make the ferry to be on time to pick up Emma and Hannah, worried what I was going to feed to brood, fearful that the laundry was never going to get done, and whether or not I could make it through the next round of needle pokes. When I came to the realization that.....one, I can't keep this a secret any longer.....and I can't do this alone.

I've created this blog to post the whats, the whys, and the whens.....even when I'm not sure of the answers. I invite my friends to post their thoughts....both good and bad.....as I am going to do....no matter how good or bad.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

I like blogs. Feel like I'm on a long train ride with friends. Sometimes we talk, sometimes we listen, sometimes just look out the window to watch the world.

Thanks for reaching out.

Thom and Linda said...

Joan, your sense of humor blows us away. Your Mom and Dad, whom we love, has kept us updated but your website will be great. All our
camping have you in their prayers. Let us know if we can do anything for you! Loe, Thom and Linda

Miss Melissa said...

Hey Joan,
You are a courageous person. Continue to be strong and know that you are not alone. Seems like you have a wonderful support system. This will be an interesting journey for you and I am glad I can be apart of it. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

dugger said...

Hello.....hello....is this thing on? I sent a comment last night, but I needed to sign up first. I guess this is the new millenium. You can share your illness online. It's a good thing. We are supposed to write it down, talk it out. At least that's what I tell people.

I was listening to some old REM music last night and it felt good. I was thinking about the time we were driving from Lake Tahoe through the scenic Sierra Nevada Mountains on the way to the not as scenic Yuba City. We had a week off, we had been to Carson City visting my sister and we were playing REM on the car cassette player. Life was simple and beautiful, at least in that little moment.

I don't know if this last week has been a roller coaster or more like a catapult. Hurled, face first into the great unkown. Life can be that way sometimes. I know there will be better days and news soon.

Your son and I have been signing off our emails to each other with a Bruce Springsteen lyric, so I thought that would be appropriate in this forum. God knows his music has helped me through a lot of tough times.
"There's a dark cloud rising from the desert floor.
I packed my bags and I'm heading straight into the storm.
Gonna be a twister to blow everything down,
That ain't got the faith to stand its ground."

Anonymous said...

The only help I can give you Joan is my prayers and they have helped me in many ways and believe me I will pester the lord to help you and your family.
I will keep in contact and wish I could help you with your daily life and your family as they help you.
Mary

Anonymous said...

Joan, i think this is one of the hardest thing i have had to write and i first want to say i am so sorry for what you and your family are going through. Know i understand and so want to keep in touch and be there for you at any time . I know the miles between us keeps me personally from helping you but i want you to know i am here to listen any time .You know how special you Mom is to me and i want to be and will be there for her as well.
I guess what i want to leave you with this time is my prayers are with you now and always .I Know it's going to be tuff for you but i have always told my self that God never gives us any more than we can handle .... and we learn how to be a stronger person in the end.