Sadness for an inspiration

I was very sad to hear that Elizabeth Edwards is nearing the end of her journey. She has been an inspiration to me, and helped me to keep going. I know, I know……I can hear you thinking to yourself. Why her, why not some other famous person with cancer. It’s because Mrs. Edwards was diagnosed with the exact type of cancer I have, she’s just four years ahead of me.


In the past I used to think…..OMG, I’m dying of cancer. My heart would pound, my brain would race, the anxiety I felt would stop me dead in my tracks. However Mrs. Edwards would just go on, her mantra became my mantra. Instead of dying of cancer, I would say…..OMG, I’m living with cancer. Not much changed, my brain still races, the anxiety still at times stops me, but my heart stopped beating so loud and I could turn around to notice my children’s smiles, the sun shining on my face, the music of laughter with my friends and the joy of seeing another season pass.

My heart goes out to Mrs. Edwards’s family and I think of her young children. Is this what my children will experience in the future? And when will the cancer cells in my body say that my journey is at an end?