Big Day

Tomorrow’s a big day. No it’s not my mastectomy, but I’m going in for a pre-surgery consul and I’m going to have a PET scan. The PET Scan is what makes it a big day. What’s a PET scan you’re asking yourself and scratching your head? When you have cancer you learn more about medicine that you ever knew before in you life and sometimes wish you didn’t have to know.

A PET scan is similar to an MRI, yes they stuff you into a tiny tube and you have to stay in there forever. However, it’s the best way doctors can find the cancer, see how big the cancer is and make a proper diagnosis. The pain in the butt thing is that before you have the PET scan you have to go on a special diet. All you can eat prior to the PET scan is protein and water for 48 hours. So basically you eat meat and hard cheese and drink water for two whole what seems like long, never ending days. No sugar, no carbohydrates, notta. No pasta, no sodas, no double espresso with whip cream and caramel sauce, no pasta carbonara, no creamy buttery mashed potatoes. Just meat and cheese. Of course, your body goes through withdrawals from having no sugar and carbohydrates and you feel like you are dying. Once you get to the hospital for the scan, they isolate you in a small room and you just lay there for two hours. They want your muscles to be asleep from no activity. Then they pump you full of sucrose, put you on a thin table and stuff you into a tiny, extremely loud tube for 45 minutes to 1 ½ hours. Did you know that cancer hates protein and loves sugar and carbohydrates? The cancer goes on a crazy feeding frenzy and on the scan lights up like a Christmas tree. My doctors will immediately know how big or small my cancer is, if it has spread, or if it’s dying on the vine.

Of course, I’m hoping the cancer is dying on the vine – but I have to be prepared for the worst and hope for the best. It’s a scary thing that I am going to find out tomorrow. I find out if I’m still on the cancer path of dying or if I’m on the good path of living. Or I could find out that the waters are murky and I’m going to have to keep on swimming until I can make my own path, which would be the most frustrating thing I could find out. I’m a serious type A person and need to know where I am going.

My mom (who’s back for a short while) and Rainer are going with me. They are just as scared as I am and we will all be holding hands as we find out what is happening. But at least now I’ll know something….hopefully my path will be better…..but I’ll have to wait and see.