Good things for now

I haven't written in a long while. I had my mastectomy and still am in a lot of pain. Plus, I don't want to write about bad things, so today I'm going write about a good thing that happened a while ago.

On June 14th, my son Dylan Michael Judge Hoff, graduated from Bainbridge High School. My first child, now 18 years old, finished high school. I still remember when my toe-headed little boy started school at Laurel Hill Nursery School in San Francisco. I was a work-at-home mom and Laurel Hill was Dylan's first time with organized education and daycare. He was shy and not used to being on his own. Laurel Hill was a Co-Op, with huge emphasis on parent participation. Dylan had been on the waiting list to get into the school since birth. His first teacher was Chris, I can't remember the last name. He had a master's in early education, with additional master's in psychology, but reminded me of a 60's hippie. He had long frizzy hair, wore Che Guevera t-shirts and faded blue jeans with holes in them. Remember this was 1993, it was after the Reagan years, the beginning of the Clinton years. I may have been been a San Francisco Liberal Yuppie, I was still used to downtown power suits and ties along with the 3 martini lunch. (Have you noticed how much has changed in the last 25 years, in the 80's, early 90's everyone would drink at business lunches - it went without saying. Now.....a big Not). I had enrolled my son in a political correct, yet totally family oriented school. (And I say that in a good way.....my little family split while Dylan was at Laurel Hill and without the staff and friends, my ex and I would never have worked together to create a new but separated happy family).

Dylan ended up attending public school, private school, followed by six years of public school on Bainbridge Island. Dylan is now a shy young man, but I, his dad, and my current husband, made a point of making sure that he had the best education that we could provide, making sure that we participated in his education. I remember when he was a sophomore at Bainbridge and he and another student were given cardboard and duct tape. They had to make a floating device that could go two lengths of the swimming pool - with them in it. Rainer, Dylan, the other student and his dad went to work and came up with the coolest boat ever. I went and watched the sink or swim race. Their boat was the fastest boat, beating all others in his class. He was never so proud or happy to have had our help and support him in his project.

And on Saturday, June 14th, Dylan graduated. It was a sunny day. His dad and cousin had flew up from San Francisco and Sacramento respectively for the graduation. My parents were in attendance. There was a total of eight people in his little cheering section of the football stands. I remember him marching onto the football field, ending up in the first row, sitting next to Abby. I smiled and thought it was a good thing that he was sitting next to Abby. He and Abby had been in the Y.A.C. (Young Adults in Church) Group from St. Barnabas for the last six years. The YAC's really didn't hang out together during Jr. High and High School but were a close knit of friends that supported each other during the agonizing period of puberty to young adulthood. And so Dylan graduated. We flashed photographs and yelled out a little yeahs when he walked up in a blue robe with gold scarf to get his diploma. Just as a few days earlier, his dad, Rainer and I yelled out a little yeahs when he had received a senior scholarship award. My son had graduated.

It was hard for me to watch my son graduate. I still had chemo sickness and had to leave promptly after the ceremony. Plus he was my first child and I, with sadness, knew he was soon to leave on his mission to become a writer. He's gone now, visiting his dad before he goes off to college. I have a photograph of the little shy boy on his first day of school and I now have a photograph of the shy young man on his last day of school. My, the time went by fast. But I love my son - as the little boy and now the young man.

It's all good!

Behan here...wishing I'd thought to ask her first, but suspect Joan would want the word out to readers here that surgery went smoothly today. To my surprise, she was able to get on the phone with me just a few hours later and even crack a joke! She's expected to go home from the hospital tomorrow (tangent: how is it that a major surgery like hers can only warrant insurance coverage of only ONE DAY in the hospital? how?). I'm sure she'll be posting here herself before long- meanwhile, rest easy as I am knowing another major milestone in her journey has past.

Peace, Behan